fact, it might be the worst mistake you could make in your relationship.
You may be under the impression that unless you take serious action, he will never get the hint that you want to be in a relationship with him. It may be that you're tired of waiting for him to make a serious move towards a commitment, so you feel the need to take the bull by the horns, so to speak.
The first reason why it's a bad idea to chase after your man is that it compromises your position of being equal in the relationship.
If you are doing the chasing, constant calling, most of the talking, going along with just about all of his ideas and going well out of your way to do anything and everything for him, you are seriously diminishing your role as an equal partner.
He begins to look at you and in most cases, treat you differently, because you are allowing and even encouraging him to do it. By changing your plans at the last minute to do what he wants to do and always being available at the drop of a dime, you are just making things too easy.
When you set your sights on your man and chase after him relentlessly to force a relationship, the message you are sending is one of insecurity and that your feelings run much deeper than his feelings for you. You are wearing your heart on your sleeve, and it’s very obvious to him.
This leads to the second and probably most important reason why it's a bad idea to chase after your man. He knows that he doesn't have to try very hard to be with you. He knows that all he needs to do is give you a call and you'll come running. He knows that no matter how badly he treats you, you will go along with the behavior just because you're so crazy for him.
You decide that no matter what, you're going to get him, no matter how high the price.
Usually, the high price comes in the form of your self-esteem, confidence and happiness.
Don't be fooled into believing that if you chase him long enough, you'll eventually get him and life with him will be wonderful.
In most cases, quite the opposite is true. If you are chasing your guy, he knows that you're crazy about him and he doesn't need to put in much effort at all into having a relationship with you - period. You want him so much that you'll put up with just about anything from him. You make excuses for his behavior and try to justify things to make them right in your head.
But in reality, if you are totally honest with yourself, are you truly happy with how he treats you? Do you like the fact that you are putting almost all of the work and effort into the relationship with very little from him in return?
Even if you do end up in a committed relationship or even get married one day, do you think he'll treat you any better as the years go by?
Like most women who chase after their men, they eventually grow tired of doing all the work and making all the effort. It gets old very quickly to try to be in a relationship all by yourself. It's impossible. You may grow tired of trying so hard, and burned out by all the constant work that's involved. You may fear that if you stop doing all the work and giving, he’ll decide
to end the relationship. You may grow resentful and angry. You'll definitely fall out of love with the man you chased and worked so hard to get. It's a very empty "win."
If you meet a man you're interested in, go ahead and flirt with him. Drop some subtle clues that you're interested. If there’s potential for something to develop, let him take the lead.
If you allow him to chase you, you'll see a night and day difference in the relationship, how he feels about and treats you.
If you have broken up with someone that you just know you should be spending the rest of your life with, let him come to the same realization and do what it takes to win you back.
There are things you can do to help the process along, but believe me when I tell you that the last thing you want to do is chase after a man, especially one you deeply love.
When it's his idea to come after you and has to figure out how to win you back or win your love to begin with, that is the best position you can be in. On these terms, you will have his respect, attention and the assurance that it is him who really wants to be with you. This will
result in a big difference in your relationship both now and down the road.
Focus your attention on strategies other than chasing your man and you will discover what a difference it is to be with a man who is more interested in chasing and committing to a relationship with you.