You may have goals for every area of your life. You focus on goals for your health, career, spiritual growth and your relationship.
As for your relationship, if your goal is to get a commitment from your man, you may be standing in the way of just letting it happen.
When you sit down and right out a list of goals, you may include action steps and things that have to happen in order for you to reach those goals. You may also include deadlines.
But remember that life is not just a series of action steps. Remember that life is about
people, and in your case, that special guy who you want to share your life with.
If you are so focused on achieving the goal of getting a commitment, then you may be forcing and even blocking the results from coming your way. Most people today believe that things don't happen unless you make them happen. While that's not always a bad thing, it just doesn't always work in every situation, especially in relationships and matters of the heart.
Also, by forcing an outcome, you may be losing touch with your light and fun side. By trying to force your man to make a decision about something he not ready for, or not sure that he wants right now, your forced outcome may turn out to be more bitter than sweet.
A commitment must come from deep feelings within your guy. These deep feelings cannot usually be forced according to the schedule on your goal list.
Not only that, but you tend to become so freaked out and anxious when it doesn't look like you're going to meet your goal deadline, that you become worried, stressed out and even depressed. The harder you try to force something, the more it usually eludes you.
You can become so focused on the end result and frustrated because you're not getting there, while in the meantime missing all kinds of beautiful and intimate moments along the journey to a commitment.
With goals taking over the moment, you are not really listening to your guy when he talks. When you go out together, your mind may be racing with thoughts of a commitment,
instead of enjoying a few good laughs and a nice dinner with some simple, intimate conversation, with no ulterior motives running on auto pilot through the back of your mind.
When your goals and thoughts of the end result are the primary thoughts in your mind, you are present physically, but not emotionally. Don't think your guy won't be able to sense your distraction or distance.
If you can just let go of goals and results, you will find yourself more relaxed, happier and really able to connect deeply and intimately with your man. You will be able to have fun again.
Goals are great and we all need to have them. However, goals that are taking over and ruling all of your thoughts and actions in the relationship is not at all where you want to
You will be cheating yourself out of so much enjoyment that may be right there in your relationship that you cannot see because your mind is elsewhere.
By living in the moment instead of goals taking over the moment, your man will love the fact that suddenly, you are 100% present in the time you share with him.
He'll be able to tell the difference, and you'll be able to feel it in the connection with your guy.